Well, here's the thing: I have been locked in a room by a bad guy (probably a terrorist or something - I will ask him when he removes the tape from my mouth). He has taken me into a room and told me that if I press the button in the room, I will die, but the person whom he also abducted (my girlfriend whom I love) will... be released and live. She, in a similar position in the next room, has been told the same about me - I live but she dies if she presses her button. Here's the thing though, Uncle Ben, this bastard also says that if neither of us push our button, we're both going to be killed! He must be filming Saw [insert sequel # here] on hidden camera for a webcast. He's definitely devious AND technologically resourceful, which explains why there is an Internet-connected computer in here. Anyhoo, let me know, Ms. Bowl-of-Rice. I need some quick advice. He is IM'ing me threateningly, urging me to "push it real good", and not in a good way. Thanks.
Dear Pushy,
Quickly create an elaborate morse code type of communication and bang your head a certain amount of times to let your gf know that you both need to press the button at the exact same time. I don't know what this would do actually, but Im curious of the outcome myself.
My nephew whom I refer to in all serious cases like this, says to just go ahead and push your button. He also says "Bros before Ho's".
~Sincerely,
Bowl-of-Rice
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Aunt Jemimah, thank you for your suggestion. I banged my head several times, and found that it gave me both a headache and a bump on my head. My captor, hearing the ruckus, came in and asked me to knock it off. He was being motherly for some reason, and noticing my bump on the head, approached me so as to wipe the wound. Now, here's the thing, he ... See Moreneeded something to spit onto so he could wipe, and opted to use the rag he had bound my wrists in. This gave me the opportunity to choke him to death real quick while I was temporarily free. I ran out of the room and grabbed my honey just as she was about to push her button. This experience has shown me much, and I would recommend your advice to anyone else who experiences this day-to-day common occurrence. Thanks for the keen advice. I will contact you again about how to build a Murder-in-Self Defense case. Till then!!
ReplyDeleteI'd say since (presumably) neither of you has pressed your button yet...you don't love each other all THAT much. (Just a thought....)wait it out and if it turns out she loves you enough to press the button...then you get to live and exact revenge on the killer.
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